dooce…monetizing the hate.
by admin
I don’t really say much at all about what sites I visit, what blogs I follow, etc. It’s a wild
little mix. I’ve been following a few of them for months, maybe even weeks–some? For years.
Case in point: dooce.com.
I can’t remember how I stumbled upon Dooce initially, but at the time Heather(the author of
the site) was still living in L.A, was not yet married, and had no children. Now she’s married and lives in
Utah with her husband and two daughters–Leta and Marlo. So yeah, I’m a bit of a loyal reader.
Why? Because Heather is a great storyteller, and she is able to take her life and relay it to
others in an entertaining fashion. Because she struggles with depression and I can relate to that.
Because I admire her bravery and her humor. Her site? It’s a good time. Let’s just say I enjoy
it for many reasons. The source of my enjoyment isn’t really the point of this entry.
Heather has made a living from her website, which is phenomenal–a prime example of amazing
things you can do with the internet and the ability to communicate. Click here to read her story. Her readers
are all over the place, and large in number. So you can imagine the amount of feedback she must get–
feedback which includes what one could easily call “hate mail.”
Hate mail makes very little sense to me. I guess it means being so enraged with whatever is
making you mad that you just HAVE to tell the source. Personally, I think that somewhere in the far faaaar
recesses of the person’s mind, they know they have little ground to stand on in regards to their
anger. There are people with genuine complaints, but I’m talking about individuals that email you just
to say “you’re ugly” or “you are raising your kids completely wrong” or “you are stupid.”
And yes, people email Heather with this bullshit.
I want to be eloquent when explaining how that makes me feel, but sometimes feelings are best summed up with simplicity: it’s gross.
Heather, however, is awesome and decided to do something with her hate mail. Instead of just filing it
away, she’s putting it out there–on a page riddled with various ads so that the hate aimed
her way ends up making her some change. In her latest entry, she explains:
Anyway, while all this is going on people are sending me messages going, dude, do you see what is being said about you over here and over here? Oh, and right there in your comments section? And I’m all, no, but I can guess. Is it something about the way I look? My chin perhaps? The mole in the middle of my forehead? Is it about what I’m wearing, how unflattering it is? Or how I’m an awful mother? Or how I’m exploiting my children for money? Or how I love Marlo more than I love Leta? Or how my husband must be gay? Because it’s all been said. Every awful thing you can say about a human being, it’s been said about me and my family. Over and over again, like a broken record, and I guess with the intention that it will at some point hurt me so badly that I will throw my hands in the air and give up.
And I’m sitting there feeding Marlo, my abdomen wrapped in a bandage SO THAT I DON’T GIVE HER CHICKEN POX, and I’m reading an anonymous comment calling me an asshead, and suddenly I remember that conversation I had with Heather. And I’m like, you know what? I’m going to let that anonymous comment help pay for the therapy that Leta is so desperately going to need once she finds out what awful things I’ve said about her on my website.
Internet, let me introduce you to Monetizing The Hate.
Here I will be posting all the hate mail I get in my inbox and all the hateful anonymous and
not-so-anonymous comments left on this website. And let me tell you, it is a hoot!
And the money? OH THE MONEY! I am going to roll around naked in all that money!
Because that’s what assheads do!Also, for your convenience, I’ve added a link to this project at the top of the page in the navigation bar, so you can stop by at any time and see the artful way that insecurity unfolds via the anonymity of the internet.
I read a few of the hate mail entries posted and really couldn’t believe it. Why do people talk to other people like this? Especially to people they do not know, have never met, and cannot physically see? What is it about the internet that brings out the bully in others? Is it the fact that someone is putting themselves out there and finding success from it? Are individuals that bothered by another person’s success and/or livelihood? Would these same people say those hurtful things in person? Do people feel their opinions are somehow validated when they are “out there” on the internet? I’m thoroughly confused. I’m also intrigued by how much attention someone will give something that makes them so angry. If you don’t like the site or the content or the person behind it(for whatever reason), then why not go to another site and never come back? That’s pretty simple, right?
So yeah. I made this entry to post the link to Heather’s Monetizing the Hate page. I think it’s a brilliant move on her part, plus I’m a longtime reader so why not share some love? Also, I think the things people say are pretty gross, underhanded, petty, and downright pathetic. I’m not advocating meanness, but I think it’s important for others to see just how absurd some people can be when it comes to the internet.