because now or never and
i don’t want to forget her so
i’m squinting through my yawns and water and
staying up past the carriage back to
pumpkin like a beta tape rewind function
just to say i met a Mary today
she had a great handshake
I wish more women
had powerful extend-to-connects like this
she:
Type 1 diabetic who
gave herself the insulin shot
in cambridge when i stepped off the bus to take a piss
done out of this “i’m used to it” respect
that stepped me back
i told her
i have chronic pain
we didn’t talk long about it
which was great
right to the meat of the conversation
mary is from bowling green and has five kids
she’s 44
had the first before her 18th birthday and
the father left her when she was 6 months pregnant
her 26 year old son is in truck driving school
and a brand new father himself
her boyfriend is 13 years older than her
when they go to bed at night
he has to leave a light on
and she hates it
she will get up and turn it off and he’ll get right back up
turn it back on
she repeated my name within moments of introduction
she said “if you don’t remember it within the first few minutes then you’ll never get it”
she had kind of wild hair like mine
she doesn’t drink regular juice
she drinks baby juice
“less sugar”
she leaned her seat back in line with my tilted one
because she couldn’t stand to see them cockeyed
Mary
was going to Hazelton, PA
her grandmother will probably ask her to clean the baseboard again
and her father will probably talk her out of it
and when she came onto the bus
and spotted the empty seat next to me
she said
Can I sit with you girl?
And somewhere between Wheeling and Pittsburgh
we reminisced about that moment
laughed about it
“you probably didn’t know what to think of me
when I call you girl”

and i said
“well,
at least you didn’t call me butthead.”